THIS is What a FEMINIST Looks Like!

This is me from the neck down. I'm 7 months pregnant. Caroline liked the juxtaposition of the "This is what a feminist looks like" t-shirt over my large pregnant belly. I have to agree. This is what a feminist looks like. My face looked pained so I had to cut it off. I've had this t-shirt since college.

I'm not going to talk about being pregnant much here. This week, I've been consumed by two news stories - the Siberian tiger, Tatiana, who killed one person and mauled two others in San Francisco, and the assassination of Benazir Bhutto.

I'm not going to pretend to know a lot about Bhutto. I just know that her death is a huge set back for Pakistan and the Middle East. More importantly, I'm frightened by the fact that Musharref is one of the U.S.'s greatest "allies" against terrorism in the region, yet his own relationship with democracy is pretty poor. How alike are we to him? It gives me an uneasy feeling in my stomach. It's not just gas.

The story of Tatiana is a truly sad one. We can't be shocked that the animal was vicious or barbaric. She's a tiger for goodness sake. They are instinctual and they prey on and kill other animals. Just because we stick them in a pretty "enclosure" doesn't take their natural desire to hunt away. But it is a tragedy. Those poor boys are maimed and one dead at seventeen. Can you imagine dying that way? Unfathomable. Zoos can be a good place. It allows us to learn about other animals and respect their need for survival as well as our own. Zoos have become a place of sanctuary for near-extinct animals like the Siberian tiger. I don't have anything profound to say about this. I wish I did, but I'm just saddened for both the victims and the tiger.

My last random thought will be about Facebook. I was hesitant to join yet another online community (aside from MySpace) and I couldn't figure out how to use it. But after several invitations to view profiles, etc. I gave in. It's been very interesting. And provides for hours of trivial amusement. Not many folks my age are on it. If you've heard of it, you know it was designed for colleges and that is the major user. But it's catching on worldwide and I've found some folks I haven't talked to in years. That's fun. It's not that I have to find these people. I'm happy with my current friends. But it's nice to catch up with people and see what they are doing now. Natural curiosity. Check it out. I like it better than MySpace because you don't get random friend requests from people you don't know. Somehow, that seems to make it more "intimate."

Cookies and Coffee

This is been the weekend of cookies. Caroline and I are having some friends over for a Christmas Eve dinner tomorrow, so this weekend, I was chained to the kitchen. It's been fun. I am really enjoying it. I found some new cookie recipes on the internet (Myrecipes.com), and for the last two days I've been baking up a storm. The first cookie I made was actually a biscotti, cranberry and chocolate chip. I have never made biscotti before so this was a treat. Actually, I've never made any of the cookies I made this weekend. The biscotti turned out pretty yummy. The next cookie I made was pinolli. Caroline found this recipe in some Martha Stewart Magazine called Blueprint, which she will apparently stop publishing some time soon. We had some pinolli at Iggie's Pizza in Mt. Vernon. Mine didn't come out as good, but I was still impressed with myself nonetheless.

I also made two drop cookies - Oatmeal, chocolate chip, pecan and cranberry coconut chews. Neither of my cookies seemed to come out the way they're pictured on the website, but they both taste good. Frankly, I can't see how either of these cookies could be considered "drop" cookies. I thought the dough for both was very crumbly and I had to mold it into cookies before I put it on the baking sheet. However, they taste good and I hope they'll be a hit with the guests. It's really satisfying to try out new recipes. I haven't enjoyed cooking in a long time so it felt good to get back in the kitchen and cook things from scratch.

My other "from scratch" accomplishments for the weekend are cranberry sauce (I grew up eating that jello stuff from the can) and corn bread (to be used for the stuffing). However, what I am most proud of is the chocolate covered strawberries! Yum! Another new experiment for me.

You may be wondering if we're going to prepare any food that isn't dessert. Well, we have a full menu, most of which will be made tomorrow by Caroline, with the exception of the turkey and the stuffing. Caroline is making all the vegetable dishes, of which there are 4 or 5. She's also making yummy savory scones. I'm making the turkey (cross your fingers for me), the stuffing, and kugel. It should be a yummy feast.

And now for topic #2 - Coffee. I'm on a coffee tasting exhibition with our local roast masters, Zeke's. I've switched up my habits a bit. During the week, we set up our coffee to brew in advance of our waking. For this, we use Peet's. They deliver. But on the weekends, I wanted no shortcuts. We grind whole beans right before brewing. So for my whole bean fix, I've been patronizing Zeke's. They do their own roasting and I'm impressed with their selection of organic fairly traded coffees. What I'm even more pleased about is how they package the beans. I mean, they package it like everyone else, BUT they offer a half and half blend. Half regular, half decaf. Let me tell you what a pain in the ass it is to do that yourself at home. Getting two bags of coffee, one regular, one decaf, scooping some from each, etc, etc. It is a real treat. I recently tried their Ethiopian Sumatra and found it just wasn't dark enough for me. Today I broke into a French Roast. I enjoyed it, but I'm still looking for something a little more full bodied. Whatever is the next blend, it's sure to be good. Zeke's has really brightened my weekends. I highly recommend checking out their website or stopping by their store. They also have a great stand at the Waverly Farmers Market on Saturday mornings.

Happy brewing!

I'm Back... and Just In Time

Hi all, I'm back from a hiatus. This has been a challenging month, one in which blogging the randomness of my mind just wasn't going to happen. Basically, I've been preoccupied with my friend's family crisis. I didn't want to blog about it, but I will a bit today.

My best friend, T, had a family emergency in October. Her husband had a stroke caused by a large brain tumor. He has brain cancer at 43. The surgeons didn't expect him to survive the surgery, but he did. His prognosis for the cancer, however, is uncertain. And the stroke itself caused significant damage. He's lost all mobility on his right side. He's been in the hospital since the stroke, though he could be released any day now. He's currently undergoing chemotherapy and radiation for the cancer. They have two children, 6 and 3.

I can't believe T has to go through this. My heart is breaking for her. I can't imagine what it is to have life change so drastically and so permanently in a moment's time. She's trying to make sure her husband gets the best treatment while also keeping life as stable and normal as possible for their children. A 6-year old and 3-year old can't be expected to understand what's happening to their father. For them, it must be the worst feeling in the world to see him in the hospital, head shaved and unable to talk.

Caroline and I went to see her the week of Thanksgiving. T lives in California and I'm here in Baltimore. I feel so helpless being so far from her and the kids. My brief visit wasn't all that helpful. What can I do in a few days to help with a lifetime of changes? I struggled with my need to be helpful and T's need to be independent, strong, and normal. She deals with this day in and day out. She knows she has to find time to go to the grocery store, do the laundry, play with the kids. She can't rely on me who's only there a few days. It was hard.

I love them all so much. But really, what could anyone do? One of the worst things that could happen has happened, not to me but to her. I will be here however she needs me and I hope that brings her a little bit of comfort.

So as I bring myself back to my here and now, this situation makes me think about universal healthcare. It's what the Democrats want to bring to the table if they are elected president. Most of the major candidates have a universal healthcare proposal. Paul Krugman has recently criticized Barack Obama's plan (read this column and this one). The basic flaw in Obama's plan is the lack of a mandate stating everyone must buy into the plan. He's throwing out some Republican garbage about not having mandates, but the effect is to weaken the plan. He says you don't have to buy into the plan if you don't want to but the plan will be there when you need it. So many folks won't buy the insurance until they need it shifting the cost of the plan onto those who buy it now.

This has given me some pause with Barack. A few months ago he was saying all the right things about gay marriage. I was almost ready to settle on him as my candidate. But then he invited this anti-gay minister to speak at one of his rallies and now there's this misguided anti-mandate in his "universal" healthcare proposal. He's heading down the same path Howard Dean did for me four years ago. I was a Deaniac. I liked him a lot. But then Howie stuck his foot in his mouth over and over again on some foreign policy issues (long before the infamous Iowa screaming) and I became disappointed in him. I didn't care for Kerry or Edwards and so I was left without a candidate.

The same is going to happen this time around. I'm not thrilled about Hillary. Not at all. She certainly won't advance the gay agenda very far, if at all, and that's important to me as I bring a child into the world with my partner. It doesn't really matter what I think though. The nomination will be wrapped up before Maryland has its say.

However, if you want some help picking your candidate, the Washington Post has crafted this handy Candidate Quiz. It takes a little time to work all the way through it, but it's comprehensive. It's based on candidate answers to a bunch of questions. I quit a little over half way through since it seemed like there was one candidate that was standing out above the rest. Turned out to be John Edwards. Thing is, I don't really believe Edwards is genuine. I think he's just saying what he's saying to win the nomination. His "son of the working class" theme just hits me the wrong way. That's the flaw in the quiz. You have to take all the answers at face value. By the way, there's a quiz for the Republicans too. I'm thinking about trying it to see who the least detestable candidate is.

Catching Up

Sorry I've missed the blogosphere for a couple of weeks. Trust me, I miss it. There are so many things to rant and muse about. This is going to be a short post, just to update what I've been letting lurk in my brain.

First a musing. The Republican Primary contest. So enjoyable to watch the Republicans find their own candidates a bit nauseating. Whatever will they do? Wink, wink. I read a great article in Friday's Washington Post about how the Evangelical Christians, the Republicans most solid voting block, aren't excited about any of the Republican candidates for president, not at all surprising. Many expect this voting block to sit out the general election if Giuliani is the nominee because their one voting issue, abortion, will be a wash. It's just plain fun to watch this go down.

Now a ranting. Bush's veto of S-CHIP. I haven't fallen off the planet, but just haven't had the time to blog. Meanwhile, Bush has done the stupidest thing in his years as president (yes, I really feel that way). I'm so disgusted by the lies he's told to justify his position, and the outcome! To deny health care to millions (millions!!!!) of children. I'm truly sickened by it. So much so, I really can't write anything else. However, I do highly recommend reading this Paul Krugman's Op-Ed column on the issue.

Finally, I'll update on the baby situation. All is absolutely wonderful. I'm in the second trimester and most systems are functioning really well. Last week we had our sonogram and found out we're having a boy!!! I'm so excited. I really wanted a boy, but don't ask me to explain that. I think he's beautiful. Of course, seeing a black & white picture of him made by a contraption that uses sounds to create a picture is hardly the way to judge how beautiful he is, but trust me, he is wonderful. I'm feeling him move around more and more, which is so freaky and great.

I know many of you may have questions about lesbian pregnancy, like how did you do it and who's the daddy, etc. I'm inviting you to ask any and all questions and I will answer them in great detail in a future post. Please don't be shy. Bring it on.

Coffee tip: Get back to basics. Go buy some freshly roasted beans at a local coffee distributor. Get out the grinder and make yourself a fresh pot of coffee with freshly ground beans. Then sit back, sip and relax.

Coffee IS Good for You!

Recently, my partner decided to quit coffee, believing it is the culprit behind various maladies. As you would expect, quitting caused her great pains - headaches, fatigue, general feeling of daze. There's a school of thought that says if you have a caffeine high, you'll have a caffeine low and in order to be more even, you should quit the joe.

I couldn't disagree more. Yes, coffee must be addictive. Otherwise, why would quitting be so hard, and why do I continue to crave coffee's sweet nectar? But according to many, many studies summarized in a WebMD article, coffee is darn good for you! I'm not going to question the wisdom of these studies. No other drug gets such great press. Bottom line is that there is great benefit to drinking at least two cups of regular coffee a day.

Coffee isn't just the substance that keeps you regular anymore. It reduces your chances of getting serious diseases such as Diabetes and Parkinson's. It also reduces your chances of getting certain cancers. According to researchers, it's the caffeine in coffee that makes it so good. Yes, we drinkers of the juice know that already. But it's the caffeine that boosts our chances of staying healthy. There is more caffeine is a cup of coffee than there is in soda or chocolate. And coffee doesn't have to have the crap that soda and chocolate have. Coffee is pure.

Even decaf coffee offers some benefit, but not nearly as much as the beloved caffeinated version. Hey, it's in Wikipedia! There's also bunches of antioxidants in coffee. We love antioxidants. So don't fret my friends. Drink some joe.

Coitus and the Law

I read an article in the Baltimore Sun the other day that just blew me away. There is a case before the Maryland Court of Appeals that is trying to decide if an act is rape if the sex was initially consented to, but then objected to later in the act. This blows my mind. Apparently, there is actual law that discusses various stages of sex and whether or not consent is needed throughout. I feel like I'm on some other planet.

When the lawmakers get together and write these laws, do any of them ever think it odd that this should even be decided by them? How many years will it be before a woman's right to consent is no longer decided by lawmakers? It's taken us this long to acknowledge that rape occurs, which implies that woman have a right to consent. But what I didn't realize until reading this article was that after a woman says "yes," she has to keep going until the man is finished. Sure, she can say "no" but the guy doesn't have to stop, and when he doesn't stop he's not raping her.

Help me understand how this happened. Help me understand how anyone ever felt entitled to write laws that govern when women can consent to sex and when they can't. Apparently, when a woman consents to sex, she's entered into a binding contract. What would happen if a man took a woman to court for not completing her obligation? "She said yes, and half-way through she wanted to stop which caused me duress. I'm suing for damages. She broke her contract." That's absurd, right? You know, I know it may be inconvenient to have to stop in the middle, but life is full of inconveniences.

Clearly, our laws still favor a man's right to sex. A woman, by her biological nature, is obligated to provide sex to a man, except under certain circumstances. You can say "no" and then the man has to respect that, but if you say "yes" you are fully obligated to follow through.

If the court doesn't rule in favor of changing the law, the only recourse will be the legislature. I'm having reflux here. The argument to keep the law the same will be to reduce the instances that woman will cry "rape" when, according to men, rape didn't occur. But our justice system should be able to discern a real rape. And frankly, that's just a fear tactic played on the feeble sensibilities of men who aren't sure they want their own sexual behavior to undergo scrutiny.

I hope the court will see fit to make the right decision on behalf of women.

Another topic - City Cafe in Mt. Vernon. I went there this morning to study and I bought a fresh squeezed orange juice ($2.95) and a bagel. After a while I decided to order some soup. When I went back to the counter, one of the staff was preparing more cups of fresh squeezed OJ. The City Cafe gets its fresh squeezed OJ from cartons of Tropicana Orange Juice - No Pulp. Hey, if you're going to lie about your product, maybe you should prepare it out of sight of the customers. Just a thought.

Can we solve our marriage crisis?

This is the only place I can really rant. Believe it or not, some people don't like to hear me rant. I don't know why. I'm actually a little unprepared. I should really post my rants right when the mood hits me. But that's usually when I'm in my car with nothing but my thoughts to occupy me.

Let me go back and revisit some recent topics. Specifically, gay marriage in Maryland. You can go back and read my previous post on the topic. Now that the court has ruled against gay marriage, the issue, and the solution, falls back into the hands of us gay folks and our allies. After reading some of the analysis on the court case itself, I have to admit that I think we've pursued the wrong path from the beginning. I've always thought the gay marriage battle was premature. I've since altered that position, but not completely. It's premature for many of us who had no need to get married. But after being with my partner for over six years, and now that we're starting a family, the need for marriage laws is a much higher priority for me. I think that gays and lesbians who are arguing that pursuing gay marriage is premature ought to consider that their position is influenced by their current, probably stable, personal situation.

None-the-less, politically, it is clear that the will to give GLBT citizens equal access to marriage equality just doesn't exist. It doesn't exist anywhere, even in Massachusetts. In Massachusetts, the supreme court ruled in favor of gay families, but at least a slight majority of citizens disagreed with the ruling. Subsequently, the state legislature began a bloody battle of trying to change their constitution to specifically prohibit gay marriage. The effort failed, thankfully, in part to getting a new governor who didn't support the measure. And so gay marriage exists in one state of the union.

In many other states, gay marriage has been outright rejected, or ignored, and on occasion, "compromised" into something called civil unions. While Maryland has been able to defeat amendments to our state's constitution banning gay marriage, actually getting pro-gay marriage legislation passed is another matter altogether.

One newspaper article questioned the timing of the lawsuit. Apparently our Court of Appeals was pretty conservative, but two judges were nearing their mandated retirement. Just in time for our newly elected Democratic governor to appoint new ones. Most of us believe he'll appoint progressive judges to the court. With his wife being a judge, our governor has a pretty intimate knowledge of the candidate pool. Anyway, the question is, why not wait for this opportunity? It seems that a different set of judges would have ruled in our favor. No guarantees, obviously, but our chances would have been better. I've heard that our lobbying group, Equality Maryland, was frustrated at their lack of progress during the recent Republican administration and decided to take their legal battles to the court. I think the families who were a part of that lawsuit were counseled poorly. We've suffered a setback and I think it will take us a good amount of time to overcome it.

Let's consider the landscape. Our state is facing a $1.5 billion budget deficit that must be overcome in order to balance the budget, which is required by law. For years, long before our Republican governor came and went, legislators have been crying for structural changes in the budget to fix the bothersome deficit. O'Malley, newly elected governor, has decided to take it on. I don't like all his strategies (and I'll write about that some other time), but his effort is long overdue and really brave. Most importantly, it will take all the political muscle he can muster up. You see, the plan involves taxes, and lots of them. There will be very little room left in his legislative agenda for anything else. He will blow all his favors on getting his budget bills passed. Gay marriage will be so far off his radar screen, not to mention that of our legislature's, we don't have a snowball's chance in hell (I've always wanted to use that saying) of being successful this year.

How do you think our brave GLBT lobby will handle this situation? They're going to ignore it. This is our greatest downfall. We're going to act like there is nothing else as important as getting the right to marry. We're going to march into our legislator's office, piled with over 1,000 bills, and scream and yell about how we're being discriminated against and insist they drop everything to correct this injustice. That will be our first mistake. We won't look at the big picture. We'll act like our heads have been buried in the sand. Forget the deficit! I want to plan my wedding!

Listen, I want to get married. Believe me, I'm scared for my child and what obstacles Caroline and I will have to overcome being gay parents. But most people can't sympathize with my position. They don't understand, and during a 90-day legislative session, they don't have enough time to learn. What are we doing about it now? Before the fun begins? Where is the organizing of Equality Maryland? All they care about is their upcoming fundraiser. It doesn't cost much to start a letter-writing campaign. You've got a contact list, send an email. Our legislators need to start hearing from us now. But nope. Equality Maryland is more concerned about pulling off another great gig, and maybe we'll hear from them again in January.

Well, I'm going to write to my legislators. They need to hear from us. They need to know how marriage discrimination is affecting our everyday lives. I don't think we'll solve our marriage crisis this year, but if we could, we're getting a really slow start.

Wealthy Can Afford Raise in Top Tax Rate

Gov. Martin O'Malley should be commended for the changes he's proposing to Maryland's income tax rates ("O'Malley details cut in income tax," Sept. 20).

Although the changes are relatively modest, Mr. O'Malley has approached income tax reform in a fair way.

Given Maryland's status as the richest state in the union, those earning salaries above $150,000 should be able to cough up an additional 1 percent of their income to continue to enjoy the services they receive from our government.

Most Republicans applauded President Bush when he implemented his devastating tax cuts.

Now Mr. O'Malley wants to give working families a break by making our tax code more progressive, and the Republicans are trying to find something wrong with the plan.

But the fact is that you can only cut so much from the budget while demanding road and bridge repairs, new schools, and better government services.

And since the changes in the income tax system are the fairest part of Mr. O'Malley's deficit-reduction plan, that proposal deserves a chance.

Aimee Darrow

Baltimore

This was published in today's Baltimore Sun

. What I can do now is add the parts the editor cut out. Most importantly, I pointed out that when Bush sent everyone those ridiculous $100 checks, the Republicans almost wet their pants telling us how fair he was to working families. O'Malley's new income tax plan will save most Marylanders about the same amount of money annually.

I also noted that the Republicans all support slot machine gambling to raise revenue, which is most devastating to low-income families. It seems like they want Maryland's low-income families to shoulder the burden of closing our deficit. It's only fair that wealthier Marylanders pay their fair share.

On to another topic, I've added some cool new links you should check out to further your knowledge of the great world of coffee. Check out Coffee Universe which should also be known as "Coffee University" for all the good information it has. I also added a link to Paul Krugman's blog, which I mentioned a couple posts ago. In the future, I'll be adding some GLBT parenting sites.

This Sunday is a beautiful day for that perfect cup of coffee and some knitting. Kick back and enjoy.

Don't read the message boards

Not only is this the week GLBT Marylanders were let down by our court system, but it is also the week of Jena 6. This is an amazing issue, especially considering the decades that have passed since segregation and Jim Crow. The injustice against these six kids in a small southern town has incensed most of us who believe in fairness, justice and equality. It makes me feel ashamed that our country can't let go of its racist roots. How far will we have to dig to rid ourselves of this blatant racism?

I hate to recap because I'm sure I'll miss important details, so be sure to check out the NAACP's website for the most up-to-date information on the case. Here's what I know - About a year ago, some black students in Jena, Louisiana, asked their principal if they could sit under a tree known to be the "white" tree. Of course they were granted permission (although why they even had to ask is beyond me). But the following day, three nooses were hung from the tree. Clearly this is a hate crime and an act of intimidation that hales back decades. The school administrators called it a prank and left it at that. The incident led to mutual aggressions between black and white students. One of those aggressions were these six students beating up a white student until he fell unconscious. That student was treated at a hospital and released after a couple of hours. I read somewhere that he attended a school event that same evening. The six black students were arrested and charged with attempted murder. Outrageous. After several incidents, these were the only students to be arrested and the charges brought against them clearly didn't match the crime. Anyway, what followed was a series of injustices against these six students, leading one to continue to be incarcerated to this day.

Yesterday, the NAACP and others organized a rally at Jena to protest the injustice that continues with their legal system. Similar protests were held all over the country, including Baltimore. It feels good that people are recognizing the injustice and not being complacent. These protests should really have an effect on the outcome of the pending cases and hopefully the prosecutor will be disciplined for his clearly racist agenda.

The Baltimore Sun covered the protests in Jena and locally. The Sun also printed coverage of the recent Court of Appeals case decided against gay marriage. Curiosity got the best of me and I peeked at the message boards that responded to the two articles. I wanted to see what regular people were saying about the various issues. What I found was really disturbing. It seems like people feel that they can be outwardly hateful on the boards.

Here's an example from the Jena 6 story:

This makes me sick. I am a minority and I completely disagree with this whole Jena Six nonsense. The student who did the "prank" was suspended from the school he was attending. Had those six black students protested back then, maybe they would have some leverage to say he should have charges agaisnt him. Instead they beat the kid unconscious. That's attempted murder. That is clearly defined in the law of our country. What black people are arguing is that serious violence is ok, so long as you are retaliating in response to a racial slur or a racial scene. Haning nooses on a tree was wrong, but who did it hurt? It hurt the student. The black kids could have gotten him back by desecrating a KKK hood or something similar. Instead they went way beyond what was necessary and almost killed him. I can't believe the so many people are so ignorant to this situation. Dr. MLK Jr. wouldn't even condone the actions of those black students. Racism is wrong... but physically attacking someone is worse. No Justice No Peace? Yea, take some of your own advice.

And from the gay marriage board:

It is about time that common sense prevailed. Men who want to marry men are perverts. Women who want to marry women are perverts.

I commend the court for upholding the ban on same sex marriages! Marriage is a sacred bond between a MAN & a WOMAN!! Personally, I think it should be banned in all 50 states! Hopefully other states will follow suit and follow MD down the non-rainbow road!

To all those that oppose gay marriage: I hope you have daughters, and that those daughters marry gay men that have been beaten back into the closet by your own ignorance and proselytism. (This guy really let the posters get to him. Why would anyone wish that on an innocent straight girl?)

So, is everyone in favor of letting bi-sexual polygamists marry multiple partners of different genders? How about a father marrying a consenting adult daughter? Are Homosexuals going to draw the line at their behavior or will they push the envelope for incestuous marriage, etc?

Wow, ignorance is powerful! We can't stop teaching people about our history. We're not ready to move on yet. For now, I've learned not to read the message boards.

The End of Times Select!

In the wake of a devastating decision by Maryland's highest court to reject equality, the New York Times makes a decision to embrace it. No, I'm not talking about GLBT equality. I'm talking about the end of Times Select, the members only section of NYTimes.com. All the best features were saved to those who subscribed, which I refused to do. Now, as of today, they've put and end to it and opened up the months of columns and features that have been denied to us. Archives are free to view.

I have a lot of catching up to do. My favorite columnist, Paul Krugman, is now available to preach to me twice a week, Tuesdays and Fridays. And he's got a blog! It's called The Conscience of a Liberal which is also the title of his latest book. I can't get into all the reasons I love Paul Krugman, but I assure you, he's worth the read.

I want to commend the New York Times for ending Times Select. I can now fully enjoy the NYTimes.com experience.

Bring on the coffee (still decaf)!

A sad day for GLBT Marylanders

Today, Maryland's Court of Appeals ruled against the 19 gay and lesbian couples who sued the state for the right to marry. I won't try to explain the legal issues argued because I'm no expert. The ACLU argued that Maryland's gay marriage ban was discriminatory based on sex and argued that gays and lesbians should have the right to marry under the state's Equal Rights Amendment. Our highest court rejected this argument. You can read the ruling here or excerpts of it here.

Our only recourse is to take our fight to the state legislature. After being flatly rejected by our court system, I don't have much faith that we can get the legislature to budge on this issue. We may have won the battle against a constitutional amendment, but that wasn't easy. The fight to actually gain rights will be much harder and there's little incentive for legislators to change the status quo.

And to make matters worse, the GLBT community is dependent on Equality Maryland to lead the charge for marriage rights. This effort will take a major feat in organizing, something Equality Maryland really sucks at doing. The Executive Director, who's been around for several years now, doesn't even know all the legislators' names, especially those from Baltimore City. He's shown a disdain for our city and tries to get everything done without stepping foot in it. Apparently, they recently hired a legislative coordinator who lives in the city. That's a step, but there's no time to waste now. Our legislative session starts in January. We need to have house parties and meet ups right away to create a coordinated campaign.

On a more personal note, as Caroline and I begin our family, this decision personally affects me more than ever. We have to jump through legal hoops just to make sure our child's parents will be recognized as the family we are. Wills, powers of attorney, second parent adoption, and others I haven't thought of yet. Ironically, one of the first statements of the ruling starts with, "In declaring that the State's legitimate interests in fostering procreation and encouraging the traditional family structure...." (emphasis mine) Are these two things completely intertwined? I'm procreating. Doesn't that count? I guess not because we don't have a "traditional" family structure. Well, I'm glad my family isn't traditional. My child will grow up with three loving parents. How could that be bad? Unfortunately, he or she will have to explain over and over again to friends and adults what our family looks like and how it's just as great as anyone else's.

The court ignored the reality that science has created. Anyone can become a parent through the miracle of modern science. Our laws and legal system need to recognize the reality of today's society. There is such thing as a "traditional" family, but there's no justifiable reason to cater to that family structure. No one suffers by being more inclusive.

If you want to learn more about the case, visit the ACLU website here. I think this is significant enough to require more blogging, so I will continue the discussion in future blogs.

Confessions

Well, since starting my blog earlier this summer, I have been writing about the joys of caffeine, the greatest nectar of the morning. However, it is time for me to confess... I have been decaffeinated since early spring. Please don't think me deceitful. I love caffeine and I miss it dearly. But since April, I have been trying to conceive my first child, and the news is good! I'm three months pregnant. I hope by now, I've told you personally. If not, I swear I was going to. Anyway, that's two confessions for you. Here's one of my all time favorite Dilbert cartoons to mark the occasion (of my decaffeinating).

The baby is due March 16, 2008 and Caroline and I are totally thrilled. We don't know yet if it's a boy or a girl, but we should be finding out sometime in October. I will slowly begin enjoying the sweet nectar of caffeine after that date (meaning March). It's been challenging. I'm taking classes and the one thing I truly enjoy while sitting in a classroom is coffee. Especially after a long workday. But there is a greater good.

On to this Tuesday's municipal election. Vote! This election is often overlooked. Heck, we're only voting for Mayor, City Council President and some lame city councilman, right? Hello??? What election could be more important to your day to day? Here's my list of endorsements:

Mayor: Don't bother. I know you're going to be there anyway, but I can't bring myself to vote for any of our candidates. If you trust the polls, Sheila's got this wrapped anyway. We'll see how it goes.

City Council President: MICHAEL SARBANES. He has real world experience in tackling the problems our city grapples with. We need someone with the commitment to try new ways to make our city better. This is the only race that will truly be decided Tuesday, by your votes. It's a close one, but get to the polls, and vote Sarbanes.

Councilfolk: We've got fourteen districts, but I don't know who's running in all of them. I do know a couple of candidates that I'll plug here. BILL HENRY is running in the 4th. He, too, actually has worked in this city and directly on building on its strengths. His work at Patterson Park CDC proves it. FRED MASON is running in the 11th. This is his first run for office and our first opportunity to elect a gay candidate to the council. I think we need one. It's shameful that more gay folks don't run for office so we have to snatch up this opportunity. Also, Fred is a really smart guy who will add to the city council's new creative team. Finally, although there's no chance of this woman losing, I've got to give a shout out for MARY PAT CLARKE. She's in the 14th and she's a workhorse. She gives so much to the city and she serves her constituents well.

One last note before I go. A final farewell to a great man, Alfred H. Peet. He died August 29th at the age of 87. His dedication to good coffee, from beans to brew, was the impetus of the coffee revolution in the U.S. Learn more about the man and read testimonials here.

Rich state can afford greater tax burden

Letters to the Editor
September 2, 2007

Rich state can afford greater tax burden

With Maryland now the richest state in the country, I can't understand why citizens have such an aversion to helping the needy by paying more taxes ("Maryland is ranked as richest state," Aug. 29).

Even increasing taxes by a tiny fraction would raise a significant amount of state revenue. And there clearly are a large number of people in the state earning a decent income, even as a significant minority live in poverty and lack health insurance.

We should do the right thing and take advantage of our prosperity to help our fellow citizens who need a safety net.

Slot machines are not the answer to our fiscal problems.

Instead, let's all dig a little deeper to pay for the things we value, including health care and education. They are worthwhile investments for the wealthiest state in the union.

Aimee Darrow

Baltimore

Come out, come out wherever you are!

I'm loving the demise of the Republican party. I know, maybe I'm being optimistic, but come on! Enjoy yourself. The most recent debacle, Idaho Senator Craig. I love it. I'm just glad the gay scandal is surrounding a Republican. One day I will celebrate the day when these bathroom trists draw as little attention as the endless female prostitutes coming in and out of our elected officials hotel rooms. But for now, I get a thrill out of Republicans being accused of exactly what they profess to hate. The cartoons resulting from scandals like this are worth it.


I see two results that could come of these gay scandals. The best one is that the Republicans will realize it's too difficult to demonize gays when there are so many among their ranks. On the other hand, it could lead only the most religious zealots to be elected. (Secretly, I wouldn't mind if that happened cus you know there are some gay folk among them too.)

This is the last weekend of summer (not technically, but you know what I mean). Enjoy those last few iced lattes. I'm off to Berkeley Springs for a little R & R with my babe.

Birth Control Watch

I read a pretty scary Op-Ed in the Baltimore Sun the other day which further convinced me that another four years of a Republican in the White House will be like a nuclear holocaust on our country. Cristina Page, the author of How the Pro-Choice Movement Saved America: Freedom, Politics and the War on Sex, wrote a piece about the subtle, quiet movement against contraception. She points out the code the Republican presidential candidates are using to let the Christian right know they are against all forms of contraception. How far back in time do these fanatics want to go?

I really don't understand the opposition to birth control. I suppose no one should have sex without the goal of creating life. I wonder if husbands refrain from having sex with their pregnant wives. No need for it, right?

It's really scary to think that another Republican president could bring us all the way back to 1950. One more term and Roe v. Wade would surely be overturned. States are already doing as much as they can to reduce access to family planning, birth control and abortions. This is truly our most basic fight. If women can't have sovereignty over their own bodies, then half the country will be second class citizens. That's the Republican agenda as we speak.

We cannot tolerate this agenda and we cannot allow this minority of fanatic Christians determine the rights of half the country. We have to make sure that a Democrat wins the presidential election. I think we will, as the country is getting pretty tired of the mess the Republican agenda has left our country, but we can't take it for granted.

Check out Birth Control Watch. It's slightly fanatical in its own right, but has useful information.

Aimee for Mayor!

In Baltimore's September 11 Democratic primary, I'm writing in a new candidate for mayor - me. Even with nine candidates to choose from, there's no one I find inspiring, much less qualified. The front-runners are current Mayor Sheila Dixon and City Councilman Keiffer Mitchell. I started out supporting Mitchell, primarily because he was the best of the challengers. Sheila, as most people call her, has too many issues with her ethics. She's also never had an innovative idea in her entire career. What Sheila doesn't understand is that ethics is not just about what is legal or not, but what appears improper. She has disregarded the law on several occasions and claimed ignorance. Sheila has been acting like her sister's employment agency for years. It's a hard pill to swallow. But she put the cherry on top when she hired her sister to work her campaign. That's not illegal, but after several ethics investigations involving her behavior and her sister, you'd think she would know to avoid anything that could be perceived as improper. But that's typical Sheila.




Given Sheila's issues, I was ready to vote for Keiffer. However, Keiffer has just pushed my commitment too far. His campaign adds have been so negative and have exploited Baltimore's homicide problem. One of his ads goes so far as to feature a gun shot and an implied death of a youth. I was totally turned off by this. I was going to hold my nose and vote for him anyway, but then he really went south. He hired Julius Henson. Julius Henson has a checkered past in the campaign world. He's considered a "dirty" campaigner. He referred to a Bob Erhlich as a "nazi" in 2002. Now I don't like Erhlich, but that's just unnecessary. He plays the race card too freely, just to make noise. It's a sad turn of events in a campaign for a decent guy. It just goes to far and I can't hold my nose anymore.





Trouble is, I don't like any of the other candidates, so I'm turning to someone I can trust. Of course my one vote for me won't make much of a difference in the outcome of this race, but at least I won't feel bad when I leave the polls.





At least there is one candidate I am excited about. I'm voting for Michael Sarbanes for City Council President. He's a man who's spent most of his life in some sort of public service. I'm not going to give you his life story, you can check out his website for that. But when you compare him to the others, it's a clear choice. Anyway, Sarbanes has real ideas and experience to implement them. And he's not a typical politician. He believes in pushing the boundaries of his position to the limit to create positive change. I'm looking forward to his win.





Till next time, I'm going to sip a latte.

I'm a self-waxer

I'm a self-waxer. I'm so proud of my latest accomplishment. For the last year, I have been getting my legs (among other things) waxed by a professional (on half-priced Tuesdays at Neal's). I'm completely addicted to it. Since I'm pretty hairy, I would have to shave daily or every other day. Now, I don't even think about it for weeks. No stubble, nothing. And now no cuts. It's very liberating.

But it's also a costly habit, so I've taken matters into my own hands. This weekend, I waxed my own legs. It was great! At first, I was a bit haphazard and messy - wax all over my hands, etc. But once I got into a groove, it was easy and fun. It's much cheaper than visits to Neal's. I wouldn't recommend home waxing for anyone who never had their legs waxed. I think it was easy for me because I'm used to it.

Recently, I've been moved by the tragedy of the trapped miners in Utah. It's such a terrible situation. Something isn't right about the owner of the mine. He's so adamant about the earthquake being the cause of the cave-in despite experts providing another option - the cave-in caused the earthquake. Now the rescue has been suspended and their families are left in limbo. It's just a sad situation all around.

I've been listening to the news this afternoon, and apparently the only news worthy event is when people die. I hope that I don't die in some bizarre way that ends up in the news. That's my newest goal.

It's cool today, so I'm enjoying a hot cup of coffee. Very comforting on an overcast day.

Are you a Coffee Swilling Beaver?

This gave me a giggle this morning. (I do not have permission to re-print this cartoon. Look away to avoid breaking the law.)

In These Times

Okay, so in my quest for real news, I've turned to my favorite magazine, In These Times. I love this magazine and I highly recommend reading it. Kurt Vonnegut is associated with its origins. He's one of my heroes and I'm sure he's partly responsible for the thinker I am today (read God Bless You, Mr. Rosewater and Breakfast of Champions).

Anyway, this magazine has wonderfully written articles about very current issues. When I went to the website the other day, an article about my great state of Maryland was featured. Unfortunately, it's not the kind of news I like reading. The title is "Equating Stillbirths with Murders." It's about Maryland's Viable Fetus Act. Apparently, our lawmakers thought they were doing a noble thing by making the death of a fetus a crime equal to murder. The lawmakers were hopefully thinking of pregnant women who are abused, or worse, murdered and the abuse results in the death of the unborn baby. But right-to-lifers are using it to punish women whose fetuses die for one reason or another.

A woman in Ocean City was arrested because her child was delivered stillborn, which happens for any variety of reasons. In Maryland, mothers are supposed to be exempt from prosecution under this law, but other states include mothers. I'm sure you can imagine the consequences to these laws combined with the irrationality of right-to-lifers. How far will they go to punish women whose babies aren't carried to term? Will every miscarriage be considered a crime scene? The last seven years of unchecked Republican rule has created a creepy society that is reminiscent of The Handmaid's Tale, by Margaret Atwood. We really have to be vigilant with our local politicians because they really affect the law of the land.

Something has just occurred to me. I'm watching The View, post Rosie, and their guest host is a gay man, Ross "The Intern" Matthews. Last week, they had another gay male guest host, Mario Cantone. It would appear that Barbara Walters believes gay men are equal substitutes for women. Just a thought.

Here's a suggestion for those who can't stomach a full blown iced latte in this heat. Try iced espresso with a splash of half and half.

Our Democratic Presidential Candidates on Gay Rights

An historic moment occurred the other night when HRC and Logo got the Democratic Presidential candidates together to question them on their positions on a host of gay rights issues. This has never happened before in a presidential race, and the outcome was very enlightening. Be sure to check out the video of the candidates here. The reason this debate is so important to me, is that somehow, I will have to distinguish between these candidates that are all basically the same. And these are the issues that are incredibly personal to me, so it's a good start.

I heard about the forum the next morning on NPR. My alarm woke me up to Barack Obama explaining why he supports civil unions, but not civil marriage (a position almost all the candidates have). Barack Obama supports full civil rights for gays and lesbians. He believes civil unions will be equal to civil marriage. But for him “marriage” can have religious connotations. For him, it's just a matter of semantics. He says semantics may be important to some, why not say it’s important to him? Because if it is just semantics, then why would it hurt to give us marriage instead of unions? Listen to yourself, Barack. Another little thing that pissed me off, was that he believes this isn't the time to fight for marriage rights. We should be focused on other more concrete civil rights issues like ending discrimination in the workplace, etc. The real issues with day to day consequences as he sees it. He doesn't believe our inability to marry one another and have the over 1,000 rights associated with marriage has day to day consequences. What's wrong with this picture?

Unfortunately, Hillary Clinton did no better, which is a shame. Frankly, I'm leaning toward voting for her, but sometimes she makes it hard for me. Her position is much less eloquent and frankly, misguided.

What she says here is that the states should continue to decide for themselves if they will allow gay marriage. Any idiot can see this is NOT in the best interests of gays and lesbians. Basically, she's saying it's okay that gays and lesbians won't know from state to state what level of rights they have. One state can have marriage, like Massachusetts. The next could have civil unions, like Vermont, and the next after that could have the klan, like any state in the south. Give me a break. She actually points out that many states outlawed any type of union for gays and lesbians, but then overlooks that fact by saying some states have taken a different position. How can this be okay? What is she smoking? Also, she doesn't suggest repealing DOMA altogether, but just the part that says states may not acknowledge the rights of other states.

This is a huge set back in my support of Hillary. While Barack talked in circles about semantics, he's at least consistent in his support that gays and lesbians need full equal rights in our society, not just state by state. If the country were completely (or more so than right now) in favor of gay marriage, you'd see all these politicians change their tunes.

Let me leave you with words from my favorite candidate who, sadly, will never get elected, Senator Mike Gravel who seems truly sincere in his support for gay marriage.

At least I get to hear these words of wisdom during the campaign. I'll be sad when we don't hear from him any longer after the first primaries are held and he drops out. Stay strong Mike!

Hello global warming!

Well, today and yesterday have been over 100 degrees here in mobtown. So hot I wouldn't let my cats out to nap on the porch. At the same time, this morning there was some crazy storm in New York which effectively shut down the mass transportation system in one of the most crowded cities in the world. I don't know about you, but I think something fishy is going on here.

Not to mention that Maryland is experiencing one of its worst droughts in history and the governor seeking a drought disaster designation. When I go outside in heat like this, I have to suspect a culprit. Global warming can't be denied! And we are a part of creating this disaster. For example, I work downtown where the heat is at least 5 degrees higher than the rest of the city and the suburbs. The reason is all the freaking cars! And trucks and buses and so on and so forth. It's foul the pollution we all dump into this world.

I've been thinking about this more and more. Especially about what I can do to reduce all the CO2 I'm emitting. Partly because my BGE bill requires me to, and partly because I realize that I can have an effect on the environment, I've been reducing and reusing like crazy. Definitely the reducing part because it saves money. But when I also realized how I could reduce my personal CO2 emissions, I felt even more strongly about turning out the lights and turning off the AC. If we all worked to reduce our CO2, and I mean all, it could really make the difference. There are websites that you can check out to learn all about going green. But remember, you don't have to do it all. Any little change can make a big difference.

It's funny, I was watching a rerun of Oprah yesterday (I know, don't say it) and Al Gore was on giving his slide show. He was doing that part when he goes into the Loews and shows us what to buy to reduce our CO2, and pointing out how cheap it is. Of course it's all relative. For example, he picked up an AC filter which was environmentally friendly and said it costs less than ten bucks. What he doesn't say is that your everyday filter only costs about 50 cents. That's a big difference! Over time we'll save more than we spend, especially if we succeed in keeping the earth habitable, but let's not lie and say these things are completely easy. They're not. But it is worth it and I'm urging everyone to get a little greener.

In the sizzling heat, stay clear of the iced lattes and stick with iced coffee. You don't want dairy in your stomach in 100 degree temps.

What happened to the news?

Let me lament again about my abscence from this blog. Once I think things have settled down, something unsettles again. That's life.

The familial visits are over for now. They went pretty well. I didn't snap at my mother until the last day of her visit. That's a real accomplishment for me. Usually I start snapping right away. I discovered a great activity to do with her. Cards. She remembers how to play canasta, so the three of us, my mom, me and Caroline, spent many hours doing that. I also had my brother, Stuart, stay with me one night. This, too, was a great accomplishment because he's disabled. I wasn't sure how he would do with the change in his routine, but he was great. I'll definitely do that again. And my mom appreciated having more time with him. So all worked out well.

I'm glad for the break, though. It's nice to just be me and Caroline again. And the cats, of course. And it's my favorite time of day again - Monday morning, with my cup of coffee.

I thought I'd revisit some of my previous posts. Specifically the one about where to get your news. Newspapers change their online formats every once in a while, trying to keep up with what's trendy and make a more user-friendly website. However, I find that at times, they make their sites too trendy and it no longer seems newspaperish. I'm referring right now to the Washington Post. (Although the most recent website to undergo such a change is the Baltimore Sun.)

Remember how I said that I liked the little gossipy quality about the Post? Well, they've taken it to a whole new level, and I have to put my foot down. The post has a section covering the presidential race called The Trail, and it's written like a blog. All articles covering the campaigns are placed in this section. It has really dumbed down the discussion to nothing but gossip. There's very little analysis, which is what I'm looking for. I think they've added this "blog" to their website to appeal to a younger audience, or something like that, but they've reduced their reporting so much, I can't read it anymore. Take, for example, the much criticized article about Hillary Clinton's cleavage. Why would the Post spend any ink on this? How is it at all relevant? And where are the corrosponding articles about the male candidates' asses and penis buldges?

I'm surprised there isn't an article discussing Barack Obama's anatomy. I mean, isn't that what everyone wonders about with African American men? How big is it really??? Of course, after the noise made about the article, the Post gets to do what all newspapers love to do ... write a story about itself. The Baltimore Sun is a regular culprit of this tactic. They love the attention. And so does the Post. It's news, right? Nope.

Anyway, this has all been really disappointing, especially since I regularly enjoyed my political news from the Post. I will click on a news title and hope it was originally published in the print version, but that's becoming increasingly rare. And The Trail is nothing but a waste of time, in my opinion. I'll be searching elsewhere for the good political stories and get back to you.

This weekend I enjoyed two great t.v. programs - the X Games, and beach volleyball. Girls in bikinis playing volleyball. Of course, as Caroline pointed out, they don't have any boobies. That's true, but easily overlooked as the rest of the package is nice. I have to assume that men love to watch this sport too, which makes me feel a little less proud of myself. I love the X Games. I love watching sports like skateboarding. I can't believe what these guys and gals do on a little board with wheels. It's been good entertainment.

Keep the caffeine coming.

Harry Potter!!

July has been a busy month. It really feels like the 4th was just last week. My mother is coming to visit this weekend and as she leaves, my cousin is coming for a couple of days. It's family time. I don't know if its the sun or something else, but I'm looking forward to the parental visit. I'm planning a low key weekend. My brother, Stuart, who is mentally retarded, will stay over Saturday night, and we'll have a cookout with the whole family - me, mom, my brothers and Caroline. I'm becoming so domestic.



The biggest excitement of the month has been Harry Potter. Yes, I said Harry Potter. The fifth film started July 11 and the last book, Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, was released Saturday, July 21. I'm a huge fan. I pre-ordered my book in February, and cleared my calendar this weekend for the marathon reading of the book. I was not disappointed at all. Which is all I'll say seeing as there are others still reading the 759 page book.



I was eagerly anticipating this final book. Everyone was. You couldn't get away from it on the news and in papers. I heard little tidbits here and there about how longtime fans might be disappointed in the book. All I have to say is congratulations to J.K. Rowling and her publishers for feeding all kinds of misinformation to the press. I was expecting something completely different and that's when I realized the press had been manipulated or was in on the manipulation of the rest of us. Good job.



I'll wait another month or so to get into the details of Harry's story. If you haven't read it by then, sorry. Every new book in the series has been pre-ordered and then read in one (long) sitting. It's a tradition. But years have passed between books. Now that the series has come to an end, I'm going to leisurely read all the books again, straight through. I think it will be very enjoyable, especially since the movies continue to be a bit more disappointing every time.



Making a movie of an 800 or so page book has got to be challenging. So I'm not going to criticize the filmmakers for their efforts. Maybe if they made a 3-hour film, they could fit in the plot development and all the action sequences. But most of their audience are kids with little tolerance for a 3-hour sit down. I think the actors have really embodied the characters well and now it's hard to imagine the characters without seeing the movie faces. I don't mind though. Especially since the actors have been consistent throughout, with the exception of Dumbledore. The original actor playing Dumbledore, Richard Harris, died after the second film, Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets.



Anyway, blogging is also a great time to drink iced latte. Give it a try.

Tall, Grande, Venti?

I think any blog about caffeine has to talk about Starbucks. Starbucks has grown so quickly that most people equate coffee with Starbucks. It's actually a quite unfortunate phenomenon. The problem is that Starbucks is like the McDonald's of coffee. If you like steak, do you go to McDonald's? No. It's not as extreme with Starbucks, but you get the point.

The thing about Starbucks is that it makes up its own rules about coffee. The most obvious and most talked about is the nonsensical labels for sizes. First, the smallest size is called a tall. Why? What's so tall about the smallest cup of coffee you offer? Then, the medium is a grande and a large is called a venti. Why does Starbucks use three different languages to identify its sizes?

What offends me so much about these sizes is that these labels are used for the espresso drinks. Espresso was not born as tall, grande or venti. No, espresso comes in shots. That's it. There's one, two, even three or four shots. The foundation of espresso drinks is the shot. Single, double, triple.

A cappuccino is 1/3 espresso, 1/3 steamed milk and 1/3 foam. If you start with a twelve ounce cup, you put in two shots of espresso. If you start with a 16 ounce cup, you would probably have to put double the espresso. Do you think Starbucks does that? Nope.

The worst thing is that Starbucks churns out these barristas, a cappuccino slinger, without really giving them the lowdown on coffee. Kids who haven't even lived long enough to know the magic of coffee are making your coffee drinks. You are leaving your caffeine fix in the hands of a 16-year-old. Watch out.

What do I recommend? My first suggestion is to support you local coffee joint whenever possible. Usually, your local coffee slinger has a passion for coffee. That passion is going to come through in every cup.

However, if you have to go to Starbucks, make sure you order it in Starbucks language. The fact is those barristas are given a formula and they can't vary from it. If you want your coffee to taste good, don't try to go against the tide that is Starbucks.

You, too, can be like Scooter

I was watching a DVD the other day and noticed something a little disturbing about this warning:

If I illegally reproduce a DVD, I can be serve up to 5 years in prison and pay a fine of $250,000. Isn't that the same fine Scooter Libby paid for his treasonous acts?

It's good to know I'd be punished to the fullest extent of the law.

I gotta vacuum. Oprah is on telling me to de-clutter my house.

Breakfast at Wimbledon

This morning's coffee came with a serving of Venus Williams, now one of the winningest women in tennis with four Wimbledon championships! Congratulations Venus!





I love women's tennis. I have missed the finals too often because it is played live at 9 a.m. But this morning I made it a point to watch it. And I'm glad I did. This marks the 50th anniversary of Althea Gibson's Wimbledon championship, the first black woman to win Wimbledon. How lovely it is for Venus to win her fourth championship this year.


Our tomatoes are finally turning red. I have to be a little more patient, but it shouldn't be too long until we're eating home grown grape tomatoes. I've definitely noticed that our plants enjoy the rain. Even though I water them regularly, they come alive in a completely different way after a good rain.



My friend Meridith pointed me to an interesting website in my last post. Sweet Maria's (check out the links in the Coffee list) is all about home coffee roasting. This seems like a really cool hobby, maybe one I'll explore soon. Can you imagine brewing fresh roasted coffee??? That would be a sweet buzz!!



Coffee tip #?: When buying roasted beans, keep in mind the saying, "the darker the berry, the sweeter the juice." I know it doesn't refer to coffee beans, but it could. Look for dark roasted beans. It will give you a richer cup of coffee. Light beans will be more acidic. But it can't just be dark. It has to have that nice coating of oil.

Canasta

This morning I taught Caroline how to play Canasta, an old card game my grandparents taught me when I was a kid. It's a complicated game with many rules played with two decks of cards. The only people I knew who played the game were Jewish, so I always thought the game originated in Europe. I was wrong. It originated in South America. Interesting.

Anyway, I've been playing Canasta for as long as I could hold thirteen cards in my hands, which is as long as I can remember. Playing Canasta while visiting my grandparents is one of my fondest memories of childhood. I'm a good card player and I impressed my grandparents. I lived for things like that.

It also reminds me of fond memories of my friend Chris Mason. Chris and I would get together (in more recent times) to play Canasta. She's the only person outside of my family that I've ever met who knew how to play the game. She'd come over, bearing gifts of deli meat for my cat, Jack, and we'd play cards all afternoon. People don't do that kind of stuff anymore. Just get together and play cards. Maybe I'll organize a card playing night with my friends.

Anyway, Chris has since passed away from cancer. My only Canasta partner in town. I'm very excited that Caroline wants to learn. She's a good card player. I know once she gets the hang of it, she'll be a very worthy opponent. It doesn't hurt that I'm giving away some of my strategies along with the rules.

Something about Canasta just makes me feel at home. I hope we play with our children after dinner. Serve Canasta with coffee and vanilla ice cream.

Missing Leisure

If at all possible, I like to start my day with a leisurely cup of coffee. There's nothing like sitting down, relaxing, and taking that coffee in, savoring every sip. Of course, I don't get this opportunity that often. Mostly just on weekends. And Mondays. I don't work on Mondays. I hate working on Mondays. It just feels cruel to abruptly end your weekend and go back to work. So instead, I work four ten-hour days and take Mondays off. My Monday cup of coffee is the best. Sitting alone, the house is quiet, sipping my coffee. Mmmm....



The ultimate cup of coffee is the vacation coffee. Leisure, leisure, leisure. I don't understand why we take so little vacation in the U.S. It's just not enough to re-energize and reset. I don't have any vacation planned for the rest of the year, so making my coffee drinking as leisurely as possible is critical to my frame of mind.



The last vacation I had was in January, when Caroline, my partner, bought us an Olivia Cruise to the Caribbean. It was so lovely, and leisurely. Last night, we watched a short DVD that Olivia sent us as a keepsake for our cruise. It brought back the luxurious feelings I had that week (I'm jonesing for more vacation).



An Olivia cruise is a decedent experience. To be on a cruise ship with all lesbians is a wild experience. No matter what you do, you're doing it with other lesbians. I can't tell you how amazing that feeling is. And the cruise line is so accommodating. They take their jobs very seriously and I felt extremely comfortable. The down side is that no one I know, including me, can afford to do those cruises with any regularity. They are pricey. More so that your standard cruise line. So it's really only for the most well to-do lesbians. However, I highly recommend taking one. You will be so glad.





It's a luxury cruise. Your room is cleaned twice a day, and the bed turned down at night. The food is wonderful. Four course meals for dinner. Lots of entertainment. Our cruise had a performance from Lily Tomlin, Suzanne Westenhoefer, and the Indigo Girls among others. And, of course, the Caribbean was great! The water was so clear and warm. The beaches were clean. It was just awesome. I fell asleep in the sun everywhere we went. I highly recommend that.




Vacations are for treating yourself. Drink cappuccino. (Personally, I need to start my day with my morning coffee, but cappuccino from then on out.)

Sputnik Sweetheart

I love weekends with no plans. I'm on my way in my journey to read many books this summer. I just finished reading Sputnik Sweetheart by Haruki Murakami. He's a Japanese writer and his books are translated into many languages. I really enjoyed this book. The plot twist took me by surprise. I love when that happens. The theme of this book is about human longing and relationships and what becomes of relationships when our desires aren't met.

This book is part of my collection of books written by Asian authors that I'm reading to learn more about the various Asian cultures and history. I think that part of the world is truly mysterious to me since my western eduction didn't focus much on it. My preference for learning is to do it through reading fiction. I believe that there is a great deal of truth in fiction. What I learned from reading Sputnik Sweetheart is how similar Japanese culture is to our own. Yes, I've seen Lost in Translation and, yes, the images of Tokyo are a lot like a modern city in the U.S. But the movie isn't about Japanese people or their habits or culture. It's about human longing. Hmmm....

Anyway, you can't know all there is to know just by watching one film or reading one book. That's why this journey will continue for some time. It's way more fun than reading a history book. Another great Asian, Chinese to be more specific, author is Anchee Min. She writes during the time of Mao and the Cultural Revolution. She's an amazing writer and I've learned a lot about the history of the Communist Party in China through her work. Of course, these aren't history books, so don't be turned off. The plots are wonderful and I always feel so satisfied when I finish one of her books. I can't even recommend one over the other, but I'll try. I really loved Wild Ginger and Becoming Madame Mao. But Red Azalea was the first book I read of Min's and it will always have a special place for me.

Anyway, my next book is ... well I'll just write about it later.

Try an iced latte with your summer reading. Yum.